Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
