Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
