In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
