Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
