THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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