I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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