He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
