so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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