I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize