"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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