Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
We need to rekindle our bromance
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
