i just wanna soil my oats bro
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
