I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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