I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
