do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize