your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
