I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
