using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
