i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
