Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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