Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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