I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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