No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
