Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize