Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
