4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Randomize
