life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize