I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
