I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
