Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Randomize
