haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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