so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
