He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
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