Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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