i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Randomize
