My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
