yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
