I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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