I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I love having hate sex.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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