I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
