idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize