Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
