Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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