i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Shame is for Republicans.
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