Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
