I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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