Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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