evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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