im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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