i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize