I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
he was CRYING into my vagina
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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