It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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